Today, I finally did something that every mama out there has either done or dreamed of doing — I sat my son down and gave him a full-blown interrogation about his personal life. Yep, I said it. Not a casual chat. A real sit-down, “where you been and who you with” kind of talk. Because listen… when your child is creeping into the house at 1, 2, even 3 a.m., and acting like it’s just another Tuesday — it’s time to get some answers.
Darius finally agreed to have lunch with me. And honey, when your grown child says yes to food and face time, you take that opportunity and run with it. We headed to this little gem of a place called Chilango — and baby, let me pause right here to tell you this spot deserves a story of its own. I first found them on DoorDash during one of my late-night cravings, but I never expected the experience I got in person. When I walked in, I was greeted by a sweet couple who looked like they just stepped out of a quiet Mormon town in Utah — but let me tell you, they were serving flavors. Real-deal Mexican food that could rival your favorite taco truck. They only serve dine-in between 12 to 2 p.m., and outside those hours, it’s all takeout. Tight hours, no-nonsense. Today, the A/C wasn’t working, but you know what? I wasn’t even mad. I figured they were trying to cut costs — and in this economy, I don’t blame them.
Back to the main event: my lunch date with Darius. As soon as we sat down with our tostadas topped with fresh pico de gallo and some exotic guava drinks, I looked him dead in the eye and said, “We’re gonna talk.”
I told him I’d noticed the strange hours — him disappearing out the door when most folks are in bed and coming back when the birds are chirping. And what really got under my skin was something he once said in passing, joking that, “these days, you might have to do something strange for some change.” Now, I know he was playing, but as a mama, that sat heavy on my spirit. You can laugh all you want, but my imagination don’t play — and I needed the truth.
Of course, Darius tried to laugh it off and claim the latest he stays out is 1 a.m. Baby, please. I know when my front door creaks at 3:07 a.m. sharp. I wasn’t born yesterday. So I pressed him harder, even asked about “sneaky links.” Y’all know what that is — those secret, not-your-business type hookups. And what did this boy do? He dodged the question like it was a pop quiz. Said it wasn’t my business. But then… he slipped up and started talking. Said that with all the dating apps and spontaneous meetups, people don’t even go on proper dates anymore. It’s a McDonald’s parking lot and a quick convo, and that’s it. Lawd, help the youth.
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But here’s the thing — once we really got into it, I was actually impressed. Darius had a more mature take on relationships than I expected. He told me his ideal age range for dating is between 20 and 30. Said once someone hits 30, it’s “too old” for him at 24. I just blinked. But then he said something that really got me — he admitted that not having his life fully together yet makes him hesitant to be in a relationship. He doesn’t want to bring someone into chaos or feel like he’s dragging anyone down. And y’all… that touched me.
We also talked about who pays on a date. Back in my day, the man paid, no questions asked, and he didn’t expect anything in return but your time and a smile. Today though? The game done changed. I told him, if I were dating now, I’d probably split the bill just to avoid all that awkward “you owe me” energy. Darius agreed. He said the best way is, “I’ll pay this time, you pay next time” — if there’s a next time. Look at that wisdom!
Of course, no outing with Darius would be complete without some kind of incident. We were parked comfortably in a mostly empty lot when a whole family pulled up and parked right next to us. Not two spaces over — right next to us. I gave them a look, but it made me remember something from before. Darius once yelled at an older woman in a parking lot because she was moving too slow. He didn’t think anyone could hear him through the closed windows. But baby, everyone did. Whole parking lot went silent. He learned that day that glass ain't soundproof.
By the end of the lunch, I still didn’t get all the answers I was hoping for. He kept some things close to the chest — like sons do. But I walked away feeling like I understood my boy a little more. He’s 24, trying to figure life out, navigating relationships, freedom, and all the messiness in between. And even if he doesn’t want to tell me everything, I’ll keep watching, loving, and guiding — just like any mama would.
Because at the end of the day, whether he’s out until 1 a.m. or just lost in his own head, I’ll be right here — nosy, loving, and asking all the questions he doesn’t want to answer.
