Getting Divorced at 65: Have We Forgotten the True Meaning of Marriage?

Hey, loves! Today, Nate and I want to talk about something very important—marriage and divorce. I recently came across an article that truly shocked me...*

Alarming Numbers

Did you know that after the C0V1D p@ndemic, the divorce rate jumped to 80%? But what surprised me even more is this: a recent study from 1990 to 2021 showed that **couples aged 55 and older are divorcing at twice the previous rate**, and those aged 65 and up? Three times as much!

Can you imagine? Getting d*ivorced at 65? I honestly don’t get it. By that age, the kids are grown, you’re retired, and you've weathered so many storms together. And still... parting ways?

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When Kids Become the Center

I understand the "empty nest syndrome"—when the kids leave, couples feel lost. But where’s the real problem? We focus so much on the kids that we forget about each other.

It’s a controversial topic, but I’ll say it anyway: many people say, “My child is number one,” “My kids are everything.” It sounds noble—but what happens? When the kids leave, you suddenly realize you're strangers with your spouse.

Your kids will grow up and move out—but the one staying by your side is your husband or wife. We have to find balance: raising kids, yes—but also nurturing the marriage.

Marriage Is Not for the Weak

Nate and I have been through so many phases in our marriage. Sometimes we’re crazy in love, sometimes we just like each other, and yes—there are days when we’re not too fond of one another. That’s real marriage, y’all!

People think marriage is "I love you, you love me" 24/7. Not true! Marriage is a book with many chapters—raising little ones, building careers, kids becoming adults… Each chapter brings its own trials.

If you're selfish, marriage won’t work. It can’t be “me, myself, and I.” It has to be “us, together.”

Our Secret: Forgiveness and Prayer

Forgiveness is the #1 ingredient in marriage. I’m not joking—you’ll need to forgive over and over again. Of course, I’m not talking about serious things like ch*eating, abuse, or gambling. I mean the everyday hurts that couples can move past.

When there’s an issue, we don’t let it fester. We sit down and talk it through. Don’t let months pass by without resolving it—because months become years, and years become decades.

One special thing we do is pray together. When something is wrong, we don’t go pray separately—we get on our knees and say, “Lord, I can’t fix this—please help me.” And God always sees us through.

Love Doesn’t Need Money

Someone once said, “How can you be romantic without money?” Let me tell y’all about a time when we only had $20 a week to live on—and we were so happy!

We made little games with paper, created “coupons” that said things like “free kiss” or “massage,” and put them in a shoebox to draw from. We had picnics in the living room, sitting on blankets, holding hands, feeling like the happiest couple in the world.

Money doesn’t make happiness. Some of the richest people in the world are miserable—and d*ivorced just months after saying “I do.” Creativity must come from both sides—romance is not one person’s job.

Why D*ivorce at 65+ Makes No Sense

I honestly don’t get it. You think I’m gonna start over at 65? That new person doesn’t know what I love or hate, doesn’t know my quirks, doesn’t understand my values. You’re telling me I have to teach all that from scratch?

And d*ivorce doesn’t just affect the couple—it impacts kids, friends, extended family. You lose a whole network you spent decades building.

The grass is not greener on the other side, folks! It’s better to put that energy into understanding and loving the one you’ve shared half your life with.

Changes with Age

As we get older, a lot changes. Women go through men0pause, men deal with low testosterone. Bodies change. Desires change. But that’s no reason to give up on each other.

Intimacy still matters at 60, 70. I believe in staying connected—maybe 3 times a week when you’re younger, and less as you age. But don’t let that connection fade. We don’t want to just be roommates—we need to stay lovers.

The Third Chapter of Life

Nate and I are now in the "third chapter" of life—our kids are grown, and we finally have more time for each other. And let me tell you: this is the sweetest time! Our bond is stronger than ever.

I recently surprised Nate with tickets to see the Commodores and Spinners—his childhood favorites. We stayed one night in a local hotel, had a fancy dinner, and just enjoyed us. Small gestures like that can make a big difference.