Today, while eating with my son Darius, he shared a story that made me feel both concerned and compassionate. It was about the time he unintentionally hurt an older woman’s feelings because of his lack of patience.
A Crowded Complex
Darius lives in an apartment complex in downtown Chicago. To exit the garage, he has to drive down a long slope and pass through a small exit right before the sidewalk.
“You know, Mom, I live in a tourist area, so there are always people walking by,” Darius explained. “I have to check the small mirrors to make sure no one’s crossing from either side.”
That Saturday was busier than usual. He was waiting at the garage exit, ready to drive out.
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The Kind Group
A group of people—possibly a family—were walking in front of his car. When they saw Darius waiting, they sped up, showing courtesy and understanding.
“I thought they were so nice, speeding up so I could get out of the garage,” Darius recalled.
But right after them, an older woman appeared—walking very, very slowly.
The Moment of Impatience
“Mom, she was walking this slow,” Darius demonstrated by moving at a snail’s pace. “I figured I was inside the car, windows closed, so she wouldn’t hear anything.”
Then, the thing I feared happened. In a moment of impatience, Darius blurted out:
“Dang!”
The Heartbreaking Reaction
What Darius didn’t expect was that the woman heard him loud and clear. She turned and looked straight into his eyes through the windshield.
“Mom, she looked at me with such a… chilling expression,” Darius said regretfully. “She clutched her chest like she was shocked, and her eyes were full of… disgust.”
I could imagine how that woman must have felt—a young man, sitting in an expensive car, showing disrespect toward her, an elder simply walking at her own pace on the sidewalk.
Regret Came Too Late
Malik—Darius’s boyfriend—immediately asked, “Why would you do that?” And Darius quickly realized his mistake.
“I felt awful, Mom,” Darius admitted. “I told her, ‘Please take your time, ma’am, it’s okay.’ But it was already too late.”
He described her as being around 60 years old, white, gentle-looking, and kind. “She seemed like such a sweet person, Mom.”
The Lesson I Gave My Son
Hearing this, my heart sank—not because my son is a bad person, but because he lacked the patience and respect I’ve always tried to teach him.
“You know I’ve taught you better, right?” I told Darius.
I reminded him of the times his father and I saw young people on the subway who didn’t give up their seats for the elderly, or didn’t hold doors open for women. The younger generation seems to be losing these basic values of respect.
A Mother’s Reflection
This story made me think deeply. In today’s fast-paced world, we often forget that older people have the right to move at their own speed, to be respected, and not be rushed.
That woman did nothing wrong—she was simply walking on the sidewalk, as was her right. Darius waiting was normal—it wasn’t a reason to show frustration.
Advice for My Son
“Son,” I told Darius, “honking would have been worse, but what you did was still wrong. You need to learn patience.”
I taught him, “When we’re in a car, we have no right to show attitude toward pedestrians. They have the right to walk at their own pace.”
Life Lesson
Darius felt guilty for the next five minutes of his drive—and that’s a good thing. That guilt will help him remember and not repeat the mistake.
This isn’t just a story about a moment of impatience. It’s about respect, how we treat the elderly, and learning to control our emotions.
I hope that from this story, my son—and all young people—learn that patience is a virtue, and respecting others is the foundation of a civilized society.
That elderly woman may have forgotten the incident, but I know Darius will remember this lesson forever. And that’s what matters most.
