Hey y’all, so today while eating tacos with Darius, we ended up having quite an interesting conversation. Believe it or not, I’ve already planned out my funeral! Yep, I told my husband everything — from the music to the flowers, the casket, all of it!
The Music
First things first — the music. I want Fantasia to sing at my funeral. Darius was like, “Wait, how did we go from talking about music to Fantasia actually performing live?” 😂 I don’t even know, but I want her there!
I also want some gospel from Kirk Franklin — you know, those spirit-filled songs that lift your soul. I want it to be spiritual and reverent, but also joyful.
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The Outfit & Makeup
When it comes to makeup, I want just a touch of purple on my lips. I want to look like me — not overdone or strange. Darius joked about giving me squiggly eyebrows and spiking my hair up, full glam dramatic brows in the casket.
I told him straight up, “No sir! You are not doing my makeup!” 😄
The Special Ceremony – The Crown
Now this part is very important to me. I want to be displayed on a big, soft white pillow — and on that pillow, I want a crown.
I want Darius to carry that pillow and place the crown on my head. Just like the song “I Shall Wear a Crown.” Because I will wear a crown!
Darius asked, “So are we gonna sing that song, or am I just supposed to walk up with the pillow?”
I said, “You’ll see. You’re gonna crown me right there in that casket.”
Darius laughed, “Mama, this ain’t a wedding!”
But that’s what I want — a meaningful gesture showing I’ve completed my journey here on Earth.
The Goodbye Kiss
Then Darius asked me something interesting: “Do people actually kiss their loved ones goodbye?”
I said, “Some do. Would you?”
He said, “I don’t know if I could.”
So I told him, “Darius, if it were one of my sons, I would kiss y’all. I’ve got enough kisses for you to last a lifetime.”
But he still felt a little weird about it. He said, “Mama, you’d be cold… that just doesn’t feel right.”
I joked, “Well maybe they’ll have some kind of warm fake blood in me by then!” 😂
But he went, “Mama, you wouldn’t even be there anymore. You wouldn’t know.”
And I said, “Oh, I’ll know! If you don’t kiss me, I’ll send you a sign. You’ll hear a whisper in your ear — or I’ll send a bumblebee your way!” 🐝😂
A Mother’s Reflection
I understand that everyone shows love differently. The bond between a mother and her child is something sacred — no other relationship compares. Darius may not be comfortable with the idea of giving that final kiss, and that’s okay.
What matters most is that we’re having these conversations — we’re sharing our thoughts and wishes with each other. Whether or not Darius kisses me goodbye, I know the love between us will always be there.
And hey, at least now he knows exactly what I want for my final day — Fantasia, Kirk Franklin, a crown, and all the love from my family. ❤️
